What are men to do? In clubs they must be gibbering wrecks unable to cope with only being able to talk to their person of interest. How will they cope not being able to touch a woman inappropriately? What about the boss who can’t touch his colleagues making them feel uncomfortable? The MP’s who want to touch up the odd young journalist, because that’s what they have always done? I really do worry how men are coping at the moment.
Some men feel this is an attack on them. Their masculinity. That it undermines further the patriarchal society. That feminism will have all men hated and arrested in the end, for being men.
What utter rubbish.
The #metoo campaign and other revelations seems to have united the majority of people in identifying what is inappropriate. Is it an attack on men and their behavior? In a sense it is, but did these incidents need the scrutiny?
It has created many conversations about what is appropriate for men to do to women. So, I will keep it nice and simple.
Men should not do anything to a woman that makes them feel uncomfortable. A simple rule of thumb is whether you would be happy if a man was doing this to your wife, daughter or sister. If not, don’t do it yourself. This is not about 2 young people in a club, flirting with each other. This is men taking advantage of position and power to take advantage of women, or men in the case of Kevin Spacey. Does it undermine men by all this talk? Of course not, but hopefully it makes them think about whether they should be touching strangers, friends or colleagues in the way they are.
Should we be prosecuting the MP’s who have been inappropriate (but not sexually harassing anyone) or have pornography on laptops? Of course not, but we should be able to make a judgement about their character. If they have ever promoted family values, then they should resign as a minister, due to hypocrisy, and the voting public can then make a decision as to keeping the individual as an MP. Otherwise they should keep their job. Each case should be judged separately and not dealt with on mass, with the hysteria from the media.
So, what should we take from all this man hating. First and foremost, it should give women confidence to say when they feel uncomfortable. It should give them confidence to go to the police when it is indecent. It should make men think twice about their own behavior. Then, like many changes in society, we will start to have norms about behavior and acceptability and these discussions will slowly diminish and be resigned to history as acceptable.
This is not man hating. It is not even radical feminism. It is society clearly stating borders that are acceptable. Men are not under attack, but they are losing their power over women. This equality should be celebrated as another step forward for an egalitarian society.

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